"I go outside and my nipples get hard - first the left, then the right"

"I almost flat out told the woman 'ya she's going to go back to highschool for a spectacular job of answering the phone to answer moronic questions that any idiot who could read could answer'"

"I know, we're old. We are old."

"my photo is eyeing me. it's like 'what are YOU looking at?!'"

"Walk home was old fogie free, and Diablo is still safely in hand."